Month Three: Growing

Like plants, marriage requires nurturing and everyday tending in order for it to grow.

It’s officially springtime y’all and Marcus and I are taking a crack at having green thumbs! (Say a prayer for these little plants and that we don’t forget about them!) But really, I’ve always wanted to grow things and be good at it; both my mom and grandma have always been excellent in their gardens and I hope to do the same. So for now, we will start with Target Dollar Spot plant packets, our balcony and hope for the best!

Growing in marriage…

Now I know this might be stretching the “spring theme” a little bit, but marriage really does take constant tending and attention. In this third month, Marcus and I were reminded of a few of those moments where we needed to keep it up and continue to peruse each other even though we are already married.

We recently visited Marcus’ hometown and enjoyed time with family and friends. Every now and then if Marcus did something sweet for me like, get my plate or open my door, or I would consider asking him something first before deciding on something, we would get the “Aww, they’re still in the honeymoon phase”, or “Oh listen to those newlyweds!”. It was sweet and funny, but I have known Marcus for quite some time now and I can’t imagine life any other way than doing what we do. How we treat, act and talk to each other has always been the same, or at least has grown together to create our own “language” I suppose. My hope and prayer is to always remain this constant in the way that we are because this is what makes us, us.

A strong attribute that I believe plays a big role in this, is a little piece of advice that we got the day we got engaged, never stop dating each other. At first I thought this advice was pretty generic and quite a normal thing to say to engaged couples or newlyweds, but the more I thought about it the more I understood the strength of it. It’s so easy to get into a rhythm of what you’re doing, what you are responsible for and your daily tasks. However, once you are married you still have your personal responsibilities, and you also gain your spouse’s in return, as well as, their help with yours. If you let them. I fail at this sometimes because I like to have things done a certain way and when I get something in my head, how I want to do it and when and what needs to be done about it, there’s no stopping me. Marcus knows this side of me very well and still loves me no matter what. He is the one to look at me and see where my head is at and tell me it’s all going to be okay. I am constantly fighting that battle to let him and to ask for his help, it is where I am challenged to grow.

This unique language, this constant nurturing, this caring, is what keeps us who we are and appreciative of one another. It’s the days that we neglect these responsibilities that go crummy and end up in a disagreement or frustration. Marriage is hard work, I know people say that but like, it really is. Newlyweds or not, it is tough and challenging. I know I don’t have all of the answers, but hopefully this spoke to you in some way. Even if you’re single or dating, I honestly would recommend this advice to practice with some of your closest friends or family; all relationships can benefit from some healthy nurturing!